March 2026
My life this March can be partitioned into three distinct phases:
- Phase 1 (3/1 - 3/17): Wrapping up the academic winter quarter + Finals!
- Phase 2 (3/18 - 3/25): Home for spring break!
- Phase 3 (3/26 - 3/31): Thrown into the midst of spring quarter classes.
The first phase was defined by "pain". This was towards the end of winter quarter, and I got sick, I felt unmotivated and lost, classes felt stupid and boring, and I felt I wasn't doing anything meaningful. I also spent a lot of time playing video games. Although this is how quarters usually end for me, at the end of the quarter (3/17) I left Santa Barbara feeling empty and muted.
The second phase was defined by rest and exploration. I slept on the later side, I stumbled down rabbit holes that I found spontaneously interesting, I saw some friends that I hadn't seen in a bit, and my brain was whisked away to my high-school days when I was (also) alone in my room. While going home itself wasn't nostalgic, all the signal cues that reminded me about my childhood and my "previous life" were present, which probably meant my behaviors 'regressed' to how they were was before I went to college.
The third phase has been defined by grind. Taking 7 classes, the start of the quarter felt shaky and weird as I struggled to define a routine for this quarter. Nevertheless, things feel new, I feel optimistic, and while I have been spending (in my eyes) excessive amounts of time playing chess, most of my time has inevitably been spent on tackling my classes. It's been a grind.
For some select events, this March, I
- knocked on a professor's door unprompted to ask if I could take a class (he said no) (3/5)
- went to LA with my school's chess club (3/7)
- took academic final exams (3/16-3/20)
- architected a 7 class schedule (which I'm now struggling through)
- met some super cool people :)
- got back on online chess :<
All in all, it's been a tumultuous month that has varied dramatically across the weeks.