Isolation and Separation
Yeah it's been a month ._.
I've been busy is what I tell myself.
People feel isolated nowadays. An ongoing loneliness epidemic, some pandemics, also some wars -- a lot is happening. And sure, we can credit the media for increased polarization, negativity bias, and other factors such as pure randomness that cause the news to be "tainted" in some way, but I think architecturally, overall, my world, at least, is shifting towards one where separation is the norm and thus isolation takes hold.
Third places are gone. What made third places so valuable was that people were there on their own accord, you could drag a friend to the library with you or to a salon, but overall, people who were there wanted to be there, and most importantly, they wanted to engage in conversation. Furthermore, the leaving cost was/is high (e.g. if you left the library it would take some effort to walk/drive/bike back), and there was no network holding things together -- people simply existed close enough geographically so you could see what everyone was doing and eventually, conversation would start up between people that would attract more people.
Contrast this with the internet today. Sure people are there on their own accord, but the leaving cost is super duper low -- I can simply switch off my phone or switch to a different tab and I've "left." Furthermore, the entry cost is also super low, simply open that same tab and you're right there. What this results in is that individuals can constantly enter and exit "if they feel like it," leading to a situation where prolonged conversation is not possible. Add on the fact that most people are "multi-tasking" or at least trying to do multiple things at once (as opposed to simply being in a place and conversing with friends and strangers), there is less of an incentive to have and hold conversation -- since the cost of having a conversation is so low, why bother to have one at all? And if you don't like where it's going, why not just kill it on the spot? Although the internet may reflect that place of a "third place," it fails to replicate the effects of third spaces, and the architecture of it (the way in which it's set up) was not conducive to long, thoughtful, nice conversations.
Something similar happens with our transportation. Before, when sidewalks were a thing, people walked on those, and by definition, you would meet someone else on the sidewalk and have to either awkwardly speed past them, wave, or just stop and have a conversation. In that sense, the sidewalk was made for social interaction. Contrast this with cars -- in a car, you're in your own box, undisturbed by others, focusing solely on yourself. Add in the fact that you can now listen to music or call up your friend while you're in the car and it becomes clear that driving is more of a singleplayer MMORPG where you roleplay as a driver and it's not online.
Which means that driving is like the internet as both of them are not conducive to long-form active conversation between two parties.
Today, some may claim "privacy" as a reason for isolating themselves from others -- no one wants to have a bad encounter walking down the sidewalk, and no one really wants to be in a conversation with someone who looks kinda creepy. I detest this. Not privacy, I'm a fan of that tremendously, and I do believe that rooms should have doors on them, but rather the misuse of the word privacy in order to avoid social interaction or as a means of getting someone to leave or change their behavior.
Privacy is great. But the way I'll define it here, privacy is knowing that no one has any information on what you do. Clearly, (again) privacy is great. But privacy is kind of a singleplayer game -- you can't claim "privacy" on the sidewalk if it's socially accepted to wave and greet other people you meet on the street.
Alas, our social norms have changed. Is talking to random people on the street acceptable?
Well, this is another case of old (man) boy yelling at clouds to no avail.